August 28th, 2009
There are a great many people that have gone to AA/NA, a rehabilitation center, or attended some other facility and/or group, in the hopes of putting an end to their substance abuse. Sometimes these facilities/groups do work and are instrumental in helping people find sobriety.
All too often, however, that does not occur. The person may stop using his drug of choice, but becomes cross-addicted, does not find sobriety. The alcoholic may stop drinking alcohol, but turns to drugs. The addict may stop using his drug of choice, but turn to alcohol, or a different drug.
What also occurs, is that the individual may indeed stop abusing any and all substances, but turns to other addictive behaviors such as eating, gambling, risk taking, and shopping. In fact, any behavior, if taken to extremes, can be addictive.
Sobriety is not simply a matter of stopping the use/abuse of substances. It also involves the elimination of addictive activities, of behaviors detrimental to the individual and those around him.
This is a process. It is not something that occurs overnight. Certainly the substance abuse must stop. One cannot have a clean mind without a clean body. What also must be addressed are the thought processes preceding the addictive behavior(s). If one follows the path of recovery, if one hopes to find sobriety, the underlying issues must be addressed.
Tags: cross addiction, recovery, sobriety, underlying issues
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August 8th, 2009
Denial plays a major role in the addictive process. It is one of the most, perhaps the most, important factor in that process. Denial is what allows us to continue exhibiting addictive behaviors, no matter how bad things may become for us and/or others, as a result of those behaviors.
Denial occurs when one refuses, intentionally or not, consciously or not, to review or examine any aspect of his addictive behaviors. Denial takes many forms, ranging from outright denial of addictive behavior (I’m not an addict, I don’t drink, I don’t use drugs, etc.) to diversion (an attempt to change the topic) to blaming (If you had a husband/wife/kids/job like mine…). Other forms of denial include rationalization, intellectualization, and projection.
There are three basic stages of denial in the addictive process. In the first stage, denial is easy to maintain because there are very few, if any, consequences that are a result of the addictive behaviors. In the second stage, consequences of the addictive behaviors are present, but the individual does not associate the consequences, the problems, with addiction. The problem is not addiction. It is always something else. In the third and final stage of denial, the person is no longer thinking rationally. The addictive process and it various components have progressed to such a point that it is almost as if 2+2=5.
Tags: addiction, behavior, blaming, denial, intellectualization, process, projection, rationalization, refusal
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July 19th, 2009
There are many people who strongly resist taking any prescribed medication, fearing they will become addicted to the medication(s). Usually this fear exists because these individuals know other addicts.
This may be a legitimate fear if a person has an addictive personality, and knows it, or has been told so, especially by people they trust.
It is true that one should not take medication that is not really needed, but a person should not refuse to take medication that is required to alleviate pain after surgery, etc. In a reputable facility, doctors and/or nurses will dispense medication, and a person should seek to have others who will be supportive, help deal with both any medical and psychological components that may be involved.
Tags: addiction, fear, medication, resistance, support
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July 4th, 2009
Everyone enjoys a celebration. And when things are going well, during the good times, celebrate we should. Clean, sober, healthy celebration.
Some holidays, such as the Fourth of July, are a set-up for substance abuse and/or relapse. It seems that too often, holidays and substance abuse go hand in hand. Many feel they cannot enjoy the holiday, the celebration, without the liquor, the beer, the pot, the whatever.
When the (recovering) addict enters a situation where he/she is surrounded by various substances, they are placing themselves in an environment that can be extremely stressful. Early in recovery, when that recovery is still tenuous, they may wish to avoid these situations, or, at the very least, limit their attendance at them to the greatest extent possible. Later on, after working the recovery process for a longer period of time, it may indeed be possible to participate in a celebration where substances are present, but not blatantly obvious, and not indulge in any substance abuse.
The (recovering) addict does not need to deal with unnecessary stressors. Stress can lead to addiction, which results in more stress, which leads to even greater use. And the cycle perpetuates.
One of the things we need to learn in recovery is how to break that cycle. We need to learn to walk forward down the path, the road of recovery, and not remain stuck in an unbroken cycle of addiction.
Tags: addiction, celebration, cycle, holidays, recovery, relapse, sober, stress
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July 3rd, 2009
A major, perhaps the chief, component of any successful recovery program is the development and cultivation of spirituality in life.
Many assume that attempts are made to force a given religion upon participants of the program, and that many recovery programs are similar to religious cults for this reason. It is not true that any specific religion is encouraged and fostered. It is true that the development of spirituality is strongly encouraged. Spirituality is, in fact, a cornerstone of many recovery programs.
There are many opposed to the use of the terms “Higher Power” and “God.” That three letter word, however, may be considered an acronym for “Good Orderly Direction,” and not a reference to any religious group. That is what spirituality is. Living well, living an orderly life, and always moving forward in a good, secure, and safe direction.
Humans are spiritual beings. Many have asked questions such as “Is there a heaven?” “Is there a hell?” “Where did we come from?” “When and how did the universe begin?” “When and how will the universe end” “What is the nature of the universe?” However one might choose to answer these questions and others similar to them, the questioning itself is spiritual in nature. Spirituality is a way of thinking, a way of life. It is about living that period of time sandwiched betweed birth and death, living it well, and in a manner that is not detrimental to us or to others. It is about being the best we can be.
Tags: addiction, cults, recovery, religion, spirituality
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June 27th, 2009
This post is inspired by the death of Michael Jackson. Whatever opinions a person may have of the man, his music, and his behaviors, Michael Jackson was a talented and intelligent man.
It has been said many times that, in general, addicts are intelligent and talented people. While these two characteristics are not necessarily problematic ones, in an addict they can become so. The fact that a person becomes very successful in a chosen endeavor is a compliment. However, they can become so driven to achieve more and to become better and more successful that the drive becomes overwhelming and interferes with one’s ability to function well in society. Appearances can certainly be deceiving.
Obsession with the intelligence and well developed talent comes at a cost. As mentioned, one cost is the social/societal one. Another cost is the individual, emotional cost. Underlying issues may cease to be addressed, or may never be addressed, and may have numerous opportunities to rise to the fore, as they frequently do.
We are born, we live, and we die. If that period of life is to be beneficial to others and to ourselves, it is necessary to cultivate the development of the Whole Person, not just one aspect of the person.
Tags: addiction, intelligence, obesession, talent
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June 18th, 2009
How many times have you heard a phrase such as “I am stressed out. I need a drink?” This type of phrase may be made after something that is beneficial, or something that is not. There is good stress, stress resulting from pleasant situations, and bad stress, stress resulting from unpleasant situations.
Many ladies have said that childbirth is very stressful, but also a very pleasant and enjoyable experience. A vacation may be very relaxing and enjoyable, and at the same time, stressful. These are examples of good stress.
The loss of employment and the subsequent job search is unpleasant and may be very stressful. The death of someone close and dear is both an unpleasant and a stressful experience. These are examples of bad stress.
Stress is a fact of life. It is something we must endure because life is not perfect. What is important is how we deal with the stressors, whatever they might be and wherever we may find them. Do we wallow in a pool of misery and sit on the “pity pot,” or do we deal with the stress and move forward until the sun is shining again? One is an example of addictive behavior, staying stuck where we are, making no effort to change the situation. The other is an example of recovery based behaviors, where we continue to move forward in spite of poor situations, wherever our path may take us.
Tags: addiction, recovery, stress
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June 13th, 2009
Many people feel that recovery from addiction is “simply” a matter of stopping the substance abuse or other addictive behaviors, and never addressing the root cause(s) of the behaviors. That is not the case. The root causes must be found and addressed.
If a person ceases the addictive behaviors, but never address the root causes, it is almost inevitable that they will, at some point, relapse and again exhibit the addictive behaviors.
If, for example, low self esteem, is the underlying reason, cause, that a person exhibits the addictive behaviors, it must be addressed. The addiction may provide a false sense of strength and security, but it is just that. False.
Recovery requires a clean body AND a clean mind. Cleaning the physical body is just one aspect of recovery. The mind, the psychological, the emotional, the social, also must be clean.
Tags: addiction, low self esteem, psychology, recovery, social, underlying cause
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June 4th, 2009
Because of the current economic situation, there are a great number of people who are unemployed or underemployed, have had there hours, and salary, reduced. These people are often having a difficult time “making ends meet.”
Under these circumstances, people can experience a great deal of anger, frustration, and stress. Too often, the method(s) chosen to cope with such an unpleasant situation involve the reliance upon some addictive behavior, if not the actual use and abuse of a chemical substance.
When this occurs, it becomes increasingly difficult for the unemployed to obtain any employment or for the underemployed to obtain full-time, gainful employment. Addictive behaviors interfere with the process of seeking and obtaining employment, just as they can interfere with other aspects of a person’s life.
When this occurs, a self-defeating cycle has begun. A problem in a person’s life (unemployment) results in addiction, which then creates additional problems, etc. The cycle continues.
Breaking the cycle of addiction is necessary if one hopes to find, and live, a happy and fulfilling life.
Tags: adiction, anger, frustration, happiness, stress, unemployment
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May 24th, 2009
There are a great many individuals who are opposed to AA, NA, or any similar recovery program, because they feel such programs emphasize and attempt to force a given religion upon the participant.
Such programs have never been about religion, but are about spirituality. Although the word “GOD” is used in these programs, one might consider that to be an acronym for Good Orderly Direction. There are no religious dictates; rather, the programs are about a lifestyle, a worldview, about living a life that is peaceful, orderly, friendly, and directed.
Religious activities, such as going to a church, a temple, or a mosque, may provide a certain degree of structure in a person’s life. These activities, however, do not necessarily mean that the person is spiritual or sober. These activities may be little more than rituals.
There are, in fact, a great many people that perform religious activities on a regular basis, but when they are not doing so, exhibit addictive behaviors. These behaviors are often detrimental to the individual, as well as to those around him.
The human being is a spiritual being. It is not at all uncommon for people to ask questions such as “Is there a heaven?” “Is there a hell?” “Where did we come from?” or “Where are we going?” However one might choose to answer such questions, it is the questioning itself that is spiritual in nature. The development and maintenance of the spiritual part of our being is an integral part of sobriety, of physical and emotional health, and is something that cannot be ignored.
Organized religion does not always enter into the equation. All that is religious is not necessarily spiritual, and all that is spiritual is not necessarily religious.
Tags: addiction, religion, ritual, sobriety, spirituality, structure
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